Eggnog Pages & Fulfillment

Okay, I'm definitely not going to abandon this blog. I've noticed that in my history of chronicling thoughts, I never stick to one thing. I always drift.

I drift. I see one thing, I wanna try it. Then I see another. I go off in search of some kind of fulfillment. Nothing gets fulfilled. I'm going to stick with this. Despite the fact that I have a tumblr, I will not fail in using this blog. The two have very different purposes. While both contain my thoughts, the other is simply a show piece [I've determined at this point]. So what do I mean by show piece? Isn't this supposed to be the refined blog? Yes. But my tumblr is supposed to be for others to view and interact in a different sense. Music, pictures, thoughts that appeal to the adolescent audience. It's supposed to be... pretty. It's my little plaything. I doll it up. I' obsessed with adding things to it. Embellishing it like a scrapbook. It is my cyber waste bin of stuff.

If you're interested, here it is http://sumanamonomnom.tumblr.com/

It can't compare to the simplicity of this. This is the Moleskine of the notebook world.It goes beyond being a beautiful commodity. It becomes a beacon of inspiration. Eggnog colored pages have always inspired me. I simply need to get over my fear of making mistakes.

Mistakes are beautiful.

They can be fixed. Just add more thought, whisk to an airy consistency, and when the mixture creates peaks, you'll know it's perfect.

I just don't want to give up on this. And maybe there a deeper meaning to why I'm thinking all of this. Maybe it has to do with my indecisiveness regarding my future. Architecture or English? I can create. I can think. I can build models. But do I love it? I know my love for the English language outweighs my penchant for any other subject or field. But is this simply a moment of weakness? Maybe I love architecture, too. Why else would I have applied? Should I stick with it? Give it a chance?

People tell me I'm good. Good with architectural concepts. Also good at analyzing literary work. For some reason, these two opinions are never spoken from the same mouth. They are opposing views. One tugging me one way, the other pulling me the other way.

What to do?

I want finish something.

Add salt to taste,

S